The most believable fakemons ever!

That's sarcasm, of course. But the verdict is still damning: many people fell for these piles of vomit. Way to keep the Sugimori art for Hydreigon and Dragonair COMPLETELY INTACT. The fact that this didn't ring the alarm for some people is... well, alarming. And the last one is what happens when such an untalented hack tries to draw: it ends up looking more like Krang than an actual Pokémon.

Also, this means those people who think it's true think that the first Pokémon line to have four Pokémon in it would be a PSEUDO-LEGENDARY line of all things. FML.

Edit: I was just informed that these were supposed to be parodies. PEOPLE FELL FOR PARODIES.

What part of "NO" don't you understand?

So I got my seventeen billionth partnership offer this morning. What makes this one stand out, though, is the fact that the sender was already aware that I go out of my way to NOT accept such offers. His excuse was, "I'm sure your viewers won't mind". Yeah, sure, considering I made a poll here about that, and it turns out they WOULD mind.

As you can imagine, it made me twice as happy to click the "ban" button. Talk about stubborn! Still, it's even more annoying than usual to get partnership offers from people who know you don't want them.

The new worst game of all time, right here!

The title of worst game of all time has always been up for debate. E.T., Superman 64, Big Rigs, Plumbers Don't Wear Ties, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, you name it, someone can disagree with your pick and make a good argument.

Not anymore.

Not only does this pile of dung blatantly rip off Pokémon and Mario, but it does so while charging outrageous amounts of REAL money for not only unlockables, but necessary things like ammo and extra lives! This makes EA and Activision look respectable! Who in their right mind would buy anything for this? Not even the fool who shelled out $20000 for a Diablo 3 weapon would want to be anywhere near this! I mean, it absolutely takes the "micro" out of "microtransaction".

Oh, and it has the balls to have the word "Free" in the title. t(^.^t)

The triumph of love

This is the headline of one of this week's magazines in Quebec, and guess what it's referring to? A reality TV couple that's been going for seven months. Really? Seven months and you're already calling it "the triumph of love"? Sure, seven months is well above average for reality TV couples, but it just shows how far we've fallen as a society, if staying together for seven months is considered such an accomplishment.

Abortion causes less crime?

This is something interesting that came up at break time yesterday. I and some of my colleagues were chatting, and my boss said he read something about that somewhere. He said that apparently, about 20-25 years ago, experts thought crime rates would be much higher now than they really are. However, despite the common perception that we live in such a fucked up world (which is completely justified, mind you), that's not the case. The reason for that is, apparently, that the 90s coincide with the social acceptance of abortion. This then leads to less unwanted pregnancies being carried out, which leads to less unwanted, unloved children, which leads to less situations that would drive one to a life of crime.

Of course, there's no way to prove that kind of thing for real, but it's still a very interesting theory regardless, if only because it makes logical sense. Heck, in America states that have a higher crime rate tend to be those where abortion is frowned upon...

New Pokémon type... for real?

Seems like it may be the case, and with a theme that's been speculated about for a while to boot. The reason why it suddenly looks like it might become a thing is because PokéExperto said so, even adding it to their type chart. If that name doesn't ring a bell... this is the same fansite that leaked copious amounts of classified information prior to BW1's release.

Paradoxically, this is the very reason why I'm taking this news with a grain of salt. After all, is Gamefreak stupid enough to let them anywhere near top secret info after they just threw every NDA they signed into a fire last time around? Any sensible company would answer any of their demands with a well-deserved "fuck you". Does Gamefreak belong to that category?

Then there's the obvious matter of introducing a new type so late into the series' lifespan meaning said type won't be really effective for the next decade due to underpopulation, mass retcons or not (edit: mass retcons might make it catch up or even surpass the least common types, actually). (And to add to that, most of these retcons would be applied to Pokémon that are currently mono-Normal. Hello lack of typing variety!)

So amazingly, the masses of drooling idiots who couldn't put a non-Fire move on their Charizard to save their lives could actually be bang on, if this turns out to be true. And considering who this is coming from... I wouldn't say it's anywhere close to confirmed due to their previous NDA breach antics, but it's worth keeping an eye on.

The existential question to end them all.

When someone on YouTube asks to like/comment/subscribe, does ANYONE ever do so just because they asked, as opposed to doing so of your own free will anyway?

The Metroid Prime trilogy was directed by an idiot

Yep, an idiot who couldn't recognize a masterpiece if he made it himself. OH WAIT.

EA is so enamored with itself it can't recognize what it's doing fundamentally wrong, and at the other end of the spectrum you have this schmuck who directed three of the greatest games of all time, and now says they sucked. I wish all games sucked like these. Way to give your vote of confidence to your former coworkers, prick. At least he didn't stay with the company long enough to slam DKC4 as well... small favors, I guess.

Subscriber surge: stranger and stranger

After a few days of these shenanigans, I figured out that these daily surges of subs only seem to happen overnight. Nothing at all during the daytime. And my newest video (part 112 as of now) has an enormous amount of likes, much more than any other of my recent videos. Analytics isn't of much help, it's claiming I've gotten way less subs than I actually did.

It almost feels like someone used one of these shady sub-buying sites on my behalf. That's probably not it, but that's what it feels like. And if that IS what happened, I wonder if I should be honored that someone's willing to shell out money to get me noticed, or utterly creeped out.

A step up from pastries + Sylveon mystery continues

According to Serebii, the official site now refers to Mewtwo's new form as the Awakened form. And since I can't find anything on the English site, it's probably a Japanese thing. Which begs the question: where does this whole Éclair thing come from? Maybe both words are similar in Japanese? Who knows?

In other news, this picture has popped up, and despite the outlines, it does little to hint at Sylveon's typing, aside from the pink color which is most commonly associated to the Normal type, and a shape that resembles a wing near the bottom, which suggests Flying. So guess what? We're at the exact same point as we were two months ago! Just super.

What in the strawberry sundae hell is going on?

Okay, fun story. I went to bed last night, I was at 9975 or so subscribers. Then this morning I wake up, and somehow I'm over 10000. That count doesn't budge for most of the day, and suddenly I'm up to 10025. I haven't seen a sub surge like that in eons. Not since I ended up in Chugga's related videos, in fact.

What I want to know is, where is this coming from? Clearly someone's been advertising somewhere, but I can't see anything on Analytics yet.

Edit: Still rising. 10035 now. And I'm more and more baffled.

Éclair form's existence confirmed, but not name itself

CoroCoro's now out, and the only thing of note in it is that it confirms the new Mewtwo form is indeed just that. It doesn't outright refer to it as the Éclair form however, but at this point there's no reason to believe it's a fake name.

I'm a bit surprised at how many people are shocked by this. Despite the previous marketing on Pokémon Smash and the official sites, it hardly looked like a brand new Pokémon anyway. I blame Serebii for putting that info not on the front page where it belongs, but in a remote corner of his site where no one would ever think to look.

Now, here's an existential question: do you consider this a gen 1 Pokémon, since the species itself was introduced in gen 1, or a gen 6 Pokémon since that's when it's first going to appear? After all, this is the first time a Pokémon gets a new form in a generation that's not its own. And as far as I can tell, should Mewtwo be obtainable in X/Y, it's going to be the first time a previous legendary is available in the first pair of games of a generation.

lolnope. DENIED!

Votes are still vanishing out of nowhere. Sorry, but I'll have to stop with the polls for a while.

Let's try this again... poll time!

I wanted to do this immediately after the previous one, but since I suspected there was trouble with the vote tallying I decided to delay it a little, hence why it's not quite as topical as it should've been. Anyway, here goes... which is your favorite April Fools video of mine?

I personally will have to go with the Hello Kitty one. It was just so hilarious, pretending that I was so knowledgeable about a babies' game... I have to admit, when I came up with the idea I couldn't stop laughing. So overall, for me it's 2010 > 2011 > 2013 > 2009 > 2012.

Mewtwo alternate form actually Mewtwo alternate form?

Seems like it, at least. It was added to Serebii's gen 6 Pokémon page, and there he says that it's referred to as Mewtwo's Éclair form on the poster that was leaked last week. So, um, how did it go over the heads of so many people? Surely people fluent in Japanese would've spread the news.

Also, Éclair form, huh? That may be foreshadowing for a Psychic/Electric typing (remember the Electro Ball event from a while ago? Suddenly would make a lot more sense), or maybe it transforms into that form by gobbling down delicious pastries? Who knows. What I do know is, this guy looks like a Levitator. Psychic/Electric levitator please!

I'm just gonna call it Mewstery.

If they're not even coming out and saying it's a new Mewtwo form, then something fishy's going on. Oh well, you know the Genwunners will have a field day regardless - even with the prospect of a 90s schoolyard rumor possibly coming to life. (First Luigi in Mario 64, then thawing out Zora's Domain, then the General Leo glitch, now this. What next, Aeris comes back and says it was just a flesh wound?)

Edit: There's a huge catch now... it's being advertised as a new Pokémon IN ENGLISH. I think they enhanced the truth in that way in Japan before, but between their intent on keeping its identity under wraps, as well as this, it may be a new species entirely, despite looking like the textbook definition of an alternate form.

Starter trio poll results

I should put the word results in quotes though, because I'm pretty sure many votes randomly disappeared. Anyway, the gen 4 trio is the big favorite, with 51 votes out of 124, followed by gen 3 with 35, 1 and 2 tied at 18, and gen 5 could only get two votes. Even after all these years, it seems like these guys left us an everlasting sour taste.

I wanted to follow this up with another poll, but I think I'll wait a while for the polls to fix themselves before doing it.

There are only 24 songs in all creation.

That's not me saying it, but some of the folks over there. (See, Nico? That's what happens when you get successful.) Let's be honest here: Final Fortress and Volcano Valley have NOTHING in common, except for the key. And apparently that's enough to be considered a remix. Since there are 24 different keys in music, this means that all songs of the same key are the same song, and therefore there can only be 24 songs in the history of ever. That means Mystic Cave is a remix of the Inspector Gadget theme. That means Robo's theme is a remix of Never Gonna Give You Up. That means Twinkle Park is a remix of Vivaldi's Four Seasons.

You were born with a brain. USE IT.

The most condescending human being in existence

Can I punch him in the face? Can I? Can I? Can I? He and the Ocean Marketing guy would make such a happy pair. We need to hook these two up!

On that note, if I were Sony right now, I would be dying from laughter right now. The winner of the last gen practically faceplanted out of the blocks, and its other competitor wants EVERY GAME ON THE SYSTEM to be online-only. Sure, the developers might like that, but let's see how they like their games not selling.

More poll issues?

Seems like Blogger's having issues with its polls again. I'm pretty sure I've seen one or two votes vanish a couple times. I'd appreciate it if you could tell me if you noticed anything. Like, "haven't I already voted on this poll? Why can I still vote then?"