Saturday, December 20, 2014

Ubisoft... stop. Just, stop.

You know the 6.7 GB patch for AC Unity I mentioned a few days ago? Well, apparently it turns out the patch itself was bugged, and forced people to re-download the whole 40 GB game all over again. The patch. That was supposed to fix everything. Was bugged. 40 flippin' gigabytes. And the best part is, it DOESN'T fix everything, especially in regards to a framerate so low, especially on the Xbox One version, that even I could tell something was up. Expect another massive patch for Valentine's Day, I guess.

Friday, December 19, 2014

Hell, it's about time!

Gen 5 starters with hidden abilities. It's finally happening. What else can I say? January 9, the day Serperior finally becomes usable. Of course we're talking about a Japanese event here, but most serious battlers use Showdown anyway, where this isn't an issue. And as a questionable bonus, all three starters come with Hold Back. Do you think Contrary will be enough to propel it to OU, or will its lack of special moves be its undoing?

Thursday, December 18, 2014

Pre-holiday grab bag

- Ubisoft's reputation has been in dire straits lately, and I'm being nice with this wording. Assassin's Creed Unity's glitchiness truly befits a game released on November 11, 2014, and a new chapter of the saga of ultimate ridicule was written with the game's fourth patch clocking in at a monstrous 6.7 GB. No, that's not a typo. SIX POINT SEVEN GIGABYTES. Hey, remember Super Mario Bros. 3? A game many people consider to be among the best ever to this day? This patch, this single, solitary patch, is 18000 times the size of SMB3.

- But wait, it gets worse. How can Ubisoft get Assassin's Creed right if they can't even get... TETRIS right? That's right. This game came out 25 years ago on the Game Boy. And they can't even get it right. They can't even put A GAME BOY GAME on the PS4 and have it function decently. And here I thought nothing was ever going to top Sonic Genesis in terms of bad ports/remakes.

- The VGC rules for 2015 have been revealed. Unsurprisingly, there's no arbitrary Pokédex restriction anymore, the Soul Dew is still banned, but a big question mark was whether Deoxys would be allowed considering it lost its event legendary status. The answer to that turned out to be no. Since I don't have any knowledge of doubles, I have no idea whether Deoxys would've been useful to start with. Something tells me the offensive forms would get shredded pretty easily, but the Leaf Green and Emerald ones could have some use for dual screening and stuff. How far off am I?

- One kind of people I hate is those godforsaken Japan worshippers who think you're stupid if you don't speak a lick of Japanese. I saw a YouTube video where the guys doing it had to say a Japanese username on a constant basis, pronounced it the same way I would've, and of course some commenters saw fit to insult them just because they don't master the subtleties of a language that's only spoken on an island at the other end of the world. Of course the "stupid American" insult came into play, despite Nova Scotia not being part of the United States last I checked, and not speaking a certain language doesn't instantly make one stupid. Not even English. Heck, even for an English speaker there are tons of languages that are much more appropriate as second languages than Japanese, most notably Spanish, German or French. So if you want to tell me I'm a drooling fucktard because I don't know any Japanese, I hope you break a few bones when your high horse gets sick of you, throws you off and stomps all over you.

Saturday, December 13, 2014

Wanna know what really sucks?

The method for unlocking games in Sonic Mega Collection. Starting up each game 20 times, including many unlockables themselves, just to unlock stuff that should've been available to start with is utter bullshit. Hell, one of those unlockables is SONIC 3 & KNUCKLES of all things. You know, the biggest reason to buy a Sonic compilation to begin with?

Thursday, December 11, 2014

When attending an event commemorating someone...

...make sure you know who that person is.

There's really nothing I can add to this, it's just so embarrassing.

Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Gotta go... casually... fast?

How does a group called The Speed Gamers take almost seven years before making a Sonic marathon? This may be one of the greatest mysteries of all time, but now one of the most requested marathons EVER (not even kidding when I say that) is almost here! They've had some more minor events over the course of the last six months (can't believe it's already been that long since the only time people have ever cared about Whiscash), and raised a few thousand dollars for ACT Today, but this weekend, starting Friday at 7 PM EST, we're shifting into fifteenth gear for the big one! Money will be raised for Rockin' H Ranch, which they've done many other marathons for in the past, and may well be an instrumental reason why TSG (click the image above to reach their site) is still kicking.

As I've mentioned before, Sonic has been the odd one out for quite a while when it comes to TSG marathons. We've had Mario, Zelda, Pokémon, Final Fantasy, Metroid, Mother, and a lot of others, but never Sonic. The assumed excuse was the low quality of most recent Sonic games starting with Shadow the Hedgehog, since many of those games take quite a while to finish compared to the older titles, and who wants a stream where most of the time is spent playing garbage like 2006, Chronicles or the Storybook Not!Trilogy? Even so, people have been clamoring for a Sonic marathon in spite of that, and... well, the time has come. Even so, we had to jump through hoops to get it, since this is the end result of a Mario vs. Sonic minithon from way back in January (and even despite losing, Mario had the last laugh anyway because he gets a whole WEEK next year). And back when THAT happened, the momentum the franchise gained from Colors and Generations hadn't totally vanished yet - in fact, Sonic Boom wasn't even announced, and we were still blissfully oblivious to Knuckles' horrendous redesign.

Anyway, as for the games that are going to be played, there are a few surprises in the mix, provided the schedule doesn't change before the marathon starts. This includes notable snubs such as 3D Blast, Heroes, Shadow and Unleashed, and the presence of lesser titles like Shuffle, Spinball and the Black Knight. Chao Garden antics from the old days are also set to make a return!

All in all, I know what I'll be doing this weekend. I've been waiting for this long enough, no way am I going to miss out on this.

Monday, December 8, 2014

You thought Nintendo was worthless at marketing?

Think again. Leave it to Square Enix to always go for bigger and better, even when the honors are dubious. I've never seen a trailer kill hype this fast. I mean, compare the crowd's reactions before and after! You can tell they were expecting the next-gen graphics to kick in any second... and they never did. But who can blame them? As one of the comments on the video says, this is the kind of thing that belonged in the realm of Twitter reveals, not PSX of all places!

Tell me, why does Square not give in already? Do they not think a proper next-gen remake would pay for itself tenfold? Especially considering the only recent title of theirs that got any kind of positive reception overall was Bravely Default, and that one was a spiritual successor to a SNES classic... they really need to get some positive press going, and nothing would be bigger than a proper FF7 remake.

Sunday, December 7, 2014

What did I just watch?

What is this I don't even. Even features Rouge without any clothes on for your viewing pleasure (yet still manages to be worth an E rating). And of course the black hedgehog would play basketball. Still, it makes me long for the glorious days of Mega Knuckles. And I never thought I'd say that.